


Happy Endings are Stories That Haven't Ended Yet

by PanicsOnTheHorizon



Category: Hockey RPF, Sports RPF
Genre: Angry Sid, Driving while (slightly) intoxicated, Heartbreak, M/M, May need tissues, Pittsburgh Penguins assemble, attempted comfort, hurt and confusion, lonely Sid, song lyrics for a title
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-19
Updated: 2014-12-19
Packaged: 2018-02-27 15:37:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2698163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PanicsOnTheHorizon/pseuds/PanicsOnTheHorizon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>If Sidney could go back to that fatal night and do one thing differently, he would. He would give anything to have the love of his life back.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>*</p><p>Sidney had always imagined a life without Geno filling the empty space beside him, but he never imagined that it would hurt this bad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Happy Endings are Stories That Haven't Ended Yet

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to my fab beta Candace_X_Chambers for her wonderful help and support. Any and all remaining mistakes are mine.
> 
> This story(and it's title) inspired by the amazing band Mayday Parade, I suggest you check them out!
> 
> Remember: this is a work of merely fiction!

If Sidney could go back to that fatal night and do one thing differently, he would. Whether it had been working harder at practice, woken up in a better mood, mulling over what he wanted to say for longer than five minutes. Not jump to paranoia driven conclusions. He would give anything to have the love of his life back.

*

Sidney never really understood what made him so resistant to trusing people. It almost seems like he just woke up like that one day. Maybe he had one too many "friends" turn on him, say horrible things behind his back. He'd never thought himself to be all that affected by it. But now, at 27, Sidney realizes that it affected him in the worst of ways.

Sid's never had much of a taste for alcohol, but. Damn. What he wouldn't give for a shot of whiskey.

*

Over the years, Sidney has always laughed whenever someone compared him to a robot, but right now he'd give anything for that to be the case. Just the thought. Not being able to love, to cry, to miss. That sounds pretty fucking perfect.

Memories wouldn't mean a thing. He wouldn't be kept up every night, remembering what he so desperatly wants to forget.

He wishes he didn't know what it felt like not to be alone. To not know the feeling of endless endearment. The weight of another in the same bed. Not returning home to nothing. No one to keep him warm with an embrace. Waking up to the gentle snoring of the person he loved most. Being able to smile for no reason. Sidney wishes he knew none of these things. And remembering sucked.

*

That night haunts Sid's dreams..

_Sidney was pissed as he pulled the Rover into his and Geno's driveway. When Geno told him earlier that day that they were going out to Sid's favorite bar, just the two of them, he couldn't have been happier. But their night together was anything but happy._

_"What you talk about?" Geno asked him as he followed Sidney into their house, hanging his coat on the rack beside the door._

_Sidney slammed the door. "You know exactly what I'm talking about, G! Don't play fucking dumb with me." He threw his snow covered boots beside the door and stalked into the kitchen. Geno followed._

_"No. Really don't, Sid." He shrugged. "Thought was having good time."_

_Sidney spun around to face him. "A good time?!" He was fuming as he got into his teammates face. "What part of that did you think was good for me? Oh let me guess, the part where you drowned yourself in alcohol? Where you said barey five words to me all night?"_

 _Geno exhaled Sidney could smell the bitter drinks still on his breath. "No, Sid. I need... Want to give time to-"_

_"No, Evgeni!" Sidney was pretty close to screaming. "Don't give me that bullshit." He saw the Russian open his mouth to speak again but he didn't want to hear it. Instead he gave the taller man's chest a shove and turned to go into their living room._

_"Sid," Geno called after him. "Please listen. Is not bullshit. I'm want to give you something but not know how. So I'm-"_

_That caused the captain to spin around and face him again. "You wanted to give me something, Geno? Well guess what you did. You gave me a horrible fucking night." With that he exited the room and scurried up the stairs to their bedroom. He slammed the door shut and stood there, waiting for the approaching footsteps of his teammate. None came, allowing Sidney let out a sigh of relief._

_He quickly stripped down to his boxers and climbed into his side of the bed. Instead he heard what was likely the front door closing and the engine of Geno's Ferrari. Sidney felt chills run up his spine and he shivered although there was no circulating air coming into his room. He didn't allow it much thought, though, because the next thing he knew he was consumed by the darkness of sleep._

Sidney would always wake up with his cheeks flooded by tears, the water leaving dark pools on his pillow case.

*

The funeral was set for a month later, July 31, 2015. Sidney wanted to do anything but attend. He didn't want all those memories shoved in front of him. Didn't want everyone to see how fucking torn up he was. Sidney didn't want to witness all the mourning and crying that was certain to be there. He didn't want to see the people he hoped would one day be his in-laws. He didn't want to see his teammates and various Russian players from around the league.

It took fifteen text messages and a stern voiced call from Mario for Sid to even get out of bed.

"Il n'y a pas de fin heureuse." Mario had said to him. Sidney couldn't have agreed more.

It took Sid an hour to just put on his crisply ironed tux and find his way down the stairs. He wasn't exactly surprised to see Pascal Dupuis waiting for him.

"Hey, Sid." Duper flashed him one of his famous crooked smiles, even though Sidney could see that it was dampened by sadness. "You ready?" Sidney just nodded and followed his once lineman out his front door.

Duper's van was sitting in his driveway next to his practically abandoned Range Rover. He absentmindedly climbed into the back next to Zoe.

"Hi, Sidney." Carol-Lynne said from the front seat, shooting him a sweet smile through the rearview mirror. He sent back his best imitation.

The ride to cemetry was silent and seemed to drag on and on. Sidney felt like the sadness and mourning were closing in on him, threatening to suffocate, every mile that Duper drove.

He tried everything he could to shut his mind off as he exited the van in a zombie-like fashion. As long as he could shift into autopilot, Sidney thought he'd be able to finish this service in one piece.

For the next five or so minutes, Sidney shuffled himself from person to person, shaking the hands of people that he wasn't ready to face. Mario found him after the twentieth person or so.

"C'mon, son," Mario placed a gentle hand on his shoulder as he guided him over to the first row of seats set up for the guests. "Sit down, Sid." Sidney obeyed and Mario took the seat to his right, the rest of the Lemieux's already there.

Instead of dragging, the time seemed to fly as person after person came to offer Sid their condolences. Before he knew it, Taylor had filed the sapce on his left and Mario was staring at him from the podium positioned just left of the dark mahogany coffin.

"A bit nervous, eh?" Mario smirked and drew a quiet chuckle from the congregation. Sid blanched at him. "I asked if you would like to say a few words about our friend Evgeni. I believe that's what he would've wanted." The crowd murmurred their agreement.

Sidney's heart thundered as he approached the podium, fumbling with the button on the suit's jacket. Mario offered him a warm smile before returning to his seat.

Sidney struggled to swallow the lump in his throat as he looked up to face the lot full of familiar faces. He hadn't even realized he was crying until he started to speak.

"Evgeni. He was one of the greatest guys I've had the pleasure of meeting and playing alongside. That's for sure. I'll never forget the first time I met him, the first time I laid my eyes on him. I didn't want to look away." Sidney voice cracked as another hot drop seared his cheek."If you would've asked me ten years ago if I could imagine myself falling in love with a teammate, I'd have said that that was impossible. But one of the things that Geno has taught me is that _nothing_ is impossible. Geno... Geno was so wise and gentle. Pretty much no one could resist his charm, even when his English vocab was nonexistant."

Sidney paused to take a shaky breath and managed to find his sister's gaze before continuing. "G was, is, the love of my life. I know that noone can replace him. And if I could just... just go back to that night, I would tell him that. That I love him and I need him here with me because that's how selfish I am." He was full on sobbing now. From behind he felt a hand on his lower back. He was able to blink away enough tears to make out Mario's face. Sidney wrapped his arms around himself as he was lead back to his seat.

*

 _June 31st, 2015. Exactly ten years ago,_ Sidney thinks to himself as he places a fresh bouquet of roses on a headstone.

 _Here lies Evgeni Malkin_ , it read _A great hockey player, but an even better friend._

Sidney felt an arm snake tightly around his waist and looked over at his sister, Taylor. She gave him a small smile before resting her head on his shoulder.

"He would've been a great husband, too." Sidney whispered, eyeing the headstone again.

"The best." Taylor said in a light tone, her tongue poking out in exactly the way Geno would've done it. It made Sidney's heart clench before a loud giggle escaped from his lips, one of those honking ones that he used to make. He's sure the only reason Taylor joined in was out of pure surprise. Although it felt great the laughing didn't last long. "He would be proud of you, ya know that right?"

Sidney looked at the grass blowing softly down by his feet. His "I know" ws barely audible, even to his own ears.

Sidney felt tears rolling down his cheeks as he pulled a red velvet box he had emboidered with the Russian eagle. Inside were Sid's four Stanley Cup rings and the ring that he found in the nightand next to Geno's side of their once shared bed. Sid had discovered it a month after the funeral. On the underside of the gold band were the words "Sid always best" and what he vaguely recognized as the Russian phrase for "I love you".

Water was rapidly blurring his vision as he knelt down to place the box next to an assortment of flowers that were already there.

"I'll always love you, G," Sid choked out. "But I need to move on now." He felt Taylor's arms around him again. This time he returned the favor as they both sank into the grass.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to all the lovely people who actually read this. And sorry for any tears you may have shed, but I've been having immense feels from my two favorite centers lately and I heard this song(Everything's an Illusion by Mayday Parade) and just had to write this! I hope it was enjoyed
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated!


End file.
